Lesson 3 – Physical Contact

Slide 1 - Introduction: What Makes Me Feel Safe?

If possible, begin today’s session with a game of Tag in the hall/playground, perhaps at the end of break time before walking in to the classroom. (If you are unable to do this, you could describe the exercise or apply the teaching points to a calmer, seated game such as wink murder.)

Do not tell pupils at the start, but the purpose of playing this game is to demonstrate that when our people, places and rules are in order, we can enjoy relative safety.

Before you start, clearly define:
The rules: one person is on, if they tag someone then that person is out and has to sit down in a designated place.
A ‘safe zone’: If possible mark this out with cones or make sure that everyone understands where the boundaries of it are and how long they are allowed to stay there for, e.g. 10 seconds.
Referees: (Teacher and TA/responsible pupil) one to monitor the safe zone and ensure people only stay for the agreed time before moving on, and one to ensure that when people are tagged they go out.

Before walking back to classroom, ask pupils to think: what led to the game working so well? Why did we feel safe? (Referees, safe zone, rules)

Once back in the classroom facilitate a discussion on this, building to the key learning points below. In life, we feel safest when the following are in order:

People – Having trusted adults or people in clearly defined roles around that children can talk to about any problems or issues, no strangers.
Places – Having a practically safe environment, e.g. nothing to trip over, clearly marked fire exits, and clearly defined areas fit for purpose, not too big that they get lost etc.
Rules – Having clear rules and boundaries is important to know how they can keep themselves safe, e.g. cars travel on the left, so we know how to cross the road safely.

Extension discussion: if we feel safe when our people, places and rules are in order, what happens when we feel unsafe?

Explain that this session will help children to know what to do if ever they or someone they know feels unsafe. It will cover four different ways in which people may feel unsafe, and the first of them is with regards to physical touch.

Slide 2 - Class Discussion and Group Activity: Knowing the Rules - Physical Touch

Developing the teaching from the previous unit, remind children that God made us to love and be loved, which amongst other things means respecting one another’s bodily privacy and autonomy.

However, unfortunately some people do not subscribe to this plan of God’s for us, and tend to disrespect each other’s bodily privacy and autonomy. Therefore, for us to be safe we cannot just trust that people will treat us with respect, we have to know the rules really well:

Physical touch can be appropriate or inappropriate.

There are different types of inappropriate touch which we will look at in more detail soon.

But not all touch is inappropriate! Ask children for examples of acceptable physical touch, which may include:

o Going in for a tackle in football/rugby or when playing Tag!
o A sports coach politely and carefully correcting technique
o A doctor examining private parts for medical reasons (remember a trusted adult can be present!)
o A parent or carer holding your hand to cross the road, and giving you hugs when you want them

• We need to be able to recognise the difference between appropriate and inappropriate physical touch in order to keep ourselves safe.

To ascertain a baseline understanding of appropriate and inappropriate touch, give one pack of Appendix 1: Appropriate/Inappropriate Cards to each group and set them a time limit to sort them out into the two categories. Check the answers and discuss why children have put each card into the category they have.

Slide 3 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Overview:
In this section, there is a brief introduction to the four types of abuse – physical, emotional, sexual and neglect – before an activity where children discover and read aloud four testimonies which describe the effects and symptoms of each abuse type in more detail (to an age appropriate level). After this children will be asked discussion questions to aid their understanding and further teaching will be given. To ensure that this work is rooted in the premise that all abuse is wrong, after each further teaching section is a brief opportunity for prayer for victims of abuse.

Introduce the term ‘abuse’, asking if children know what it means. Explain that ‘abuse’ means any action or failure to act by another person – adult or child – that causes significant harm to a child.

Explain that there are four different types of child abuse, which you are briefly going to tell children about before they hear some real life stories. Click to reveal them one at a time:

Neglect – when someone fails to provide for a child’s needs, when they have enough money to do so.
Physical Abuse – deliberately hurting a child, causing injuries such as bruises, broken bones, burns or cuts.
Emotional Abuse – when someone treats a child in a way that affects their emotional well-being.
Sexual Abuse – which is inappropriate physical touch, usually around a child’s private areas.

Slide 4 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Tell children that to better understand these different types of abuse, they have four short stories about children around their age to untangle and tell:

1. Give each group Appendix 2: Four Voices, cut into pieces. There are 2 versions:
a. 2a where each story has the same colour so it’s a much easier mix and match activity
b. 2b where all the stories are mixed together and children have to work harder to solve the puzzle.

2. Groups must put the story pieces in the right order to tell all four individual stories – there are 6 pieces to each story.

3. Once they have the four stories, they should read them as a group and match each story with a type of abuse.

4. Bring the class back together.

5. Play the video on the first slide of the complete story.

6. After each, ask the discussion questions below and use the Key Information which appears on screen to deliver further teaching.

7. A brief opportunity for prayer for victims of abuse.

Slide 5-7 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Play video: Anton’s Story

Discussion Questions (click to reveal each):
• What type of abuse is seen in Anton’s story? (Click to reveal ‘NEGLECT’)
• How do you think Anton felt when his Dad left, and his Mum said it was up to him to make sure his 6 brothers and sisters were safe and happy?
• How do you imagine Anton felt seeing his Mum buy beer and wine for herself rather than food for her children?
• Anton says he feels safe now. Why, and what steps did he take to find safety?

Key Information:
Neglect is when someone fails to provide for a child’s needs, when they have enough money to do so.
• It might be failing to provide necessary food, shelter, or appropriate supervision
• Not giving necessary medical or mental-health treatment
• Failing to educate a child or attend to special education needs
• Not giving attention to a child’s emotional needs
• Letting the child use alcohol or drugs
Lord, abuse is not part of your loving plan for us. We trust to your keeping anyone who has been neglected.

Slide 8-10 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Play video: Laura’s Story

Discussion Questions (click to reveal each):
• What type of abuse is seen in Laura’s story? (Click to reveal ‘PHYSICAL ABUSE’)
• Mrs Woodburn said Laura was just ‘accident prone’. Why does she say that?
• How do you imagine Laura felt each time Mrs Woodburn tripped her or hurt her?
• Why didn’t Laura tell anyone what really happened and what do you think she should do now?

Key Information:
Physical abuse is deliberately hurting a child, causing injuries such as bruises, broken bones, burns or cuts.
• It could include punching, beating, kicking, biting, shaking, throwing, stabbing, choking, hitting, burning.
• Sometimes we do have accidents and hurt ourselves or other people by mistake. But physical abuse is done on purpose.
Lord, abuse is not part of your loving plan for us. We trust to your keeping anyone who has been physically abused.

Slide 11-13 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Play video: Jamie’s Story

Discussion Questions (click to reveal each):
• What type of abuse is seen in Jamie’s story? (Click to reveal ‘EMOTIONAL ABUSE’)
• Why has Jamie stopped singing?
• Do you think Jamie’s Dad is right – singing is for children and girls?
• What do you think Jamie’s Mum would say if she knew what was happening?

Key Information:
Emotional abuse is when someone treats a child in a way that affects their emotional well-being.
• It could include:
o Criticising constantly
o Threatening with physical harm
o Ignoring
o Rejecting
o Isolating – not allowing a child to see friends/family
o Shaming and ridiculing
o Bullying
Lord, abuse is not part of your loving plan for us. We trust to your keeping anyone who has been emotionally abused.

Slide 14-16 - Class Discussion: Four Types of Abuse

Play video: Fahra’s Story

Discussion Questions (click to reveal each):
• What type of abuse is seen in Fahra’s story? (Click to reveal SEXUAL ABUSE’)
• What happened to Fahra that is eating her up inside?
• Was Lewis’ behaviour appropriate? Why/Why not?
• What do you think Fahra should do next? What do you imagine Fatimah/her Mum and Dad might say?

Key Information:
Sexual abuse is when a child is being made, asked or rewarded for doing anything with their bodies that frightens or worries them – or being made to do this to someone else.
• Can involve touching, kissing, or being made to show private parts of their body – or being made to do this to another person
• Can also involve non-touching activities, such as being shown inappropriate films or pictures in books, magazines, on TV, mobile phones or online
Lord, abuse is not part of your loving plan for us. We trust to your keeping anyone who has been sexually abused.

Slide 17 - Personal Activity: The Four Types of Abuse - And Where to Find Help

Children should complete The Four Types of Abuse activity in their Module 2 Activity Workbook.

Today’s activity asks children to consolidate learning about abuse, so they are equipped to spot the danger signs in their own lives and in the lives of those around them. The activities will help children learn how to stand up for themselves and know that it is not their responsibility to keep secrets for other people, especially if those secrets make them feel bad inside.

It is advisable for children to complete these workbook activities independently. You might like to play music in the background to encourage focus, before bringing the class back together to conclude.

Slide 18 - Plenary

Reassure children that this can feel a lot to take in, but that all children – and adults! – have the right not to be abused. Explain that there are laws in place to prevent abuse, and to intervene and offer protection where it does occur.

Ask children what they think they should do if they think their friends or they themselves are being abused. You may like to use the NSPCC phrase ‘Speak Out, Stay Safe.’

Inform children of any safeguarding practices in your school that they should be aware of, e.g. school nurse; counsellors; designated teachers they can talk to about anything concerning them etc.

Encourage children to think about who they would talk to first, if they ever something was bothering them. If for some reason they feel they can’t, they can always phone Childline for a chat (0800 1111) or contact Childline online.

Slide 19 - Plenary

Reflection

Ask children to close their eyes and listen to you speaking. Play background music if you wish.

Lead this section using these or your own words:

“Remember that although bad things can happen, that is not God’s plan for us. God made us because He loves us. He loves you. He made you to love and be loved. And God wants us to talk to Him about anything we are concerned about. He is always there, ready to listen. God sends us Jesus to guide us. It’s like we are sheep, following a good shepherd that cares and tends to His flock. Listen to this psalm now and place your trust in Jesus:

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,
He refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley,
I will fear no evil, for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me;
You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.”

Psalm 23 (NIV)

Slide 20 - Plenary

Slide 21 - Plenary

Click to play the song for this Unit: Be My Stronghold

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